Lisa & Greg's Story Through IVF
My husband Greg and I have been together for 25 years. Aside from being my rock and the one I turn to during hardship, he is also my best friend. We share a love of dancing, and together we have built our production company (originally founded by Greg in the '80’s) "DANCE Spectacular Productions" where we produce themed entertainment for military bases, corporate events, fundraisers, state fairs and other events all over the world.
Even though our production company has been extremely important to us, both Greg and I knew that we always wanted to have a family. Back then, we knew our company would be the foundation for our future children to live a great and fulfilling life.
In 2009, we married and were ready to continue our lives together. As a new bride, I looked forward to the future with excitement and enthusiasm, but little did I know that infertility hardships were ahead. Later that year, Greg's mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease. We barely understood the disease and were terrified as we watched his mother suffer. Even though we were scared of how this disease was affecting her, we put on a brave face and decided to become her full-time caregivers by moving in with her leaving our own home vacant for several years. We strived to give her the best quality of life 24/7 including weekly trips to the movies, bowling, dancing & her favorite buffet-style dinners. Mom -- or rather, the disease -- made her physically and verbally combative towards me at times. I understood this was the disease and not her, so I would wipe back the tears and do my best to not take things personally and always keep the focus on what was best for her. We spent many sleepless nights full of sorrow praying for answers, praying for help. Mom’s doctors encouraged us to place her in a home alleviating the pressure off of us so it wouldn’t affect our marriage however we decided to continue caring for her in her own home.
Through this tribulation, the hardship strengthened our marriage and brought us even closer as a couple. Unfortunately, we were so consumed by this devastating & horrific brain disease that our lives and dreams were put on hold for years until her death on Mother's Day 2012. With all the knowledge we had from caregiving I then created a Facebook support group “Alzheimer’s Caregiver Support” that now has grown to a community of almost 20,000 caregivers from across the globe.
Even after her death, Greg and I were so grief-stricken that it took months before we could even think about our hopes and dreams. Despite our loss, we realized that this drastic life change of losing Greg's mother was an opportunity to refocus ourselves and regain hope for the future.
In 2013, Greg and I got off of birth control and decided that this would be the start of a new chapter. It was time to start our family. We thought our struggles were over, but little did we know that more issues were occurring inside my body. Upon stopping birth control, I was riddled with terrible abdominal pain. I knew something was wrong, but little did I know that this pain would be another obstacle to having a baby. Scared, confused and worried about my pain, Greg and I saw countless doctors (Gastroenterologist’s, Infectious Disease Doctors, Neurologists, etc.). Over and over again, the doctors were unable to determine, and let alone treat the problem. We would leave the doctor's office with tons of pain and no answers.
After three years, countless negative pregnancy tests and continued intense stomach pain, one doctor decided to test my gallbladder. Bingo! The test results were definitive, and our doctor had a clear-cut plan for treatment. Our hope for pain relief and getting pregnant was renewed! After my gallbladder surgery (and appendix removal), Greg and I could move forward and have a baby. I allowed myself to recover for a few weeks after the surgery, but I became really worried when my pain continued and eventually worsened to the point where I could barely walk. Concerned that something else was wrong with me, Greg and I went to my OBGYN. It was there, and through another surgery, we found out that I have endometriosis. Desperate to rid me of this disease, the OBGYN gave us three options: go back on birth control, have a hysterectomy, or live with the pain and try to get pregnant. I was so upset that I wanted to break down and cry right there in the doctor's office. I was so sick and tired of the pain and my hopes of having a bright future were dwindling again. I turned to Greg and realized that our dreams of a family were more important than any amount of pain. With a deep breath, I chose to bear the pain. Greg and I were absolutely terrified and dreaded the months ahead, but we knew that, at some point, every parent needs to be brave for the sake of their children (or in our case, future children).
Finally, in February 2019, I had yet again another surgery to determine the severity of my endometriosis. The results were diffuse stage two endometriosis meaning spread all over my reproductive organs however minimal deep implants. Based on the surgery, the OBGYN directed us towards IVF. Our difficult journey to getting pregnant was becoming more complex by the day. How were we supposed to navigate this path when doctors were telling us about more tests, more surgeries, the risks, the statistics, and the costs? We were completely overwhelmed and discouraged.
It was then that Greg and I turned it over to God. We've always had a strong faith, but our dream of having a baby seemed so out of reach that only He could help us. Greg and I dropped to our knees and prayed every night, "God, I give this all to you. If it is your will to give us children, thy will be done." Despite our prayers, it seemed like nothing was moving forward.
It wasn't until April of 2019 that I was working on booking shows for our production company. I was on my lunch break and having a conversation with God to please send me a sign that we are on the right path when the phone rang. I just expected it to be a new client who was looking to book our show. When I answered the phone, they said they were a Fertility Institute and that they were looking for entertainment for a Reproductive Symposium. My jaw dropped. Could this be that sign from God? As the conversation continued, it felt as if the pieces were coming together one by one. Four days later, we were sitting in the office with the founder, who became our IVF Doctor. It was through this seemingly random connection that we hooked up with a Fertility doctor who offered a completely new plan for us (and booked our show). God sure works in mysterious ways.
Greg and I began to rebuild hope for our future family. This could be it! This could finally be exactly what we need to have our baby. With this modified plan, however, my doctor told me that having yet another surgery -- a fourth surgery -- was essential to having successful IVF. July 2019, I had surgery to remove my Fallopian tube damaged from the endometriosis. Even though I was terrified by the absolute permanency of removing my Fallopian tube, Greg and I have kept the faith and realize that IVF is now our only solution to having a baby.
Now that we're on this new and promising path, we have been presented with this opportunity to create a "Bonfire campaign." Your purchase could help Greg and I finally start our family, a dream that is decades in the making. Plus, we thought it would be fun to make some cool swag as a memento. Thank you for taking the time to learn about our journey.”
-Lisa
"I can do all things through Him who gives me Strength" Philippians 4:13
Medical Disclaimer:
The information provided in this blog is intended for general informational purposes only and should not be considered as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your healthcare provider or qualified medical professional with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read in this blog.